odin is like “when thor was born the sun shone bright upon his beautiful face. i found loki on the sidewalk outside a taco bell”
Oðinn spake:
Bright the sun shone | at the time of Þor’s birth, And bathed his count’nance fair. Loki, wolf-father, | the trickster, the liar, I found on the cold pavement While returning in glory | from a grand hunt For a 3 AM quesadilla.
Tonight at the gym a man who looked like fuckin Thor asked me out and when I told him I was a lesbian he goes “oh. Chill. You know, my sister and I work out a lot together. She’ll be here tomorrow, same time.”
Cons: the marvel writing team are fucking cowards, only have Thor speaking english and the tree replying in groot, instead of letting that good big buff boy say “I am groot. I am groot? I am groot!” for eleven scenes. Let the man speak. He completed his coursework.
i
Also, let the good big buff boy be a bit rusty in his Groot language, say something that makes Groot look at him absolutely insulted, and then a good minute is spent in a “I am Groot!” monolgue – each one with a slightly different emphasis on it – to apologize.
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